Posts tagged ‘Tate Modern’

Chai-latte drinking qualities in a spouse

Is chai latte drinking a desirable aspect in a future spouse?

When considering potential partner-attributes, how much is too much of a quality? Where do you draw the line?

I had a beer last night with my old primary school friends KennyD and NavMan (they say hi by the way).

KennyD is looking for a girlfriend.

….on a side note, I thought I’d give a shout out to all my female readers out there. If you like smart, sophisticated, American computer scientists who like walks along the beach, Harley Davidson’s and can recite the periodic table of elements backwards (I’ve seen him do it at age 8, it’s actually very impressive. He can also do it in Latin)….then KennyD is your man. Email me for more details.

Karate and quadratic equations are KennyD's strengths

Karate and quadratic equations are KennyD's strengths

Anyhoo, KennyD has two new flatmate additions to his house. The first is a guy who is one of Australia’s leading graphic-designers specialising in 18th Century Stylistic Oriental Typography. He currently works the afternoon shift at Video Ezy as Senior Product Replacement Officer (he stacks shelves).

The second flatmate is a female who in KennyD’s words¬† is “a bit too arty”.

Hang on a minute. What exactly does “too arty” entail?

Don’t get me wrong, an ‘arty’ quality in a partner can definitely be a desirable attribute. I’m thinking modern apartments that feature nice hand-painted splashes of colour on framed canvas. You know, the kind that you see at the Tate Modern that look like a blind 3-year down-syndrome paraplegic painted with a paintbrush in his mouth….only to read the price tag ever so closely to see the painting valued at ¬£500,000.

Sorry, getting sidetracked. The point is, how arty is too arty? Where do you draw the line and say “hang on a minute honey, no I don’t want to see the photography exhibition at the Australian Art Gallery this weekend featuring visual exhibits of the endangered Botswana tree frog.I’d rather go to the pub with Robbo instead.”

KennyD explained that she frequents establishments that specialise in chai latte’s.

We established last night that yes it is safe for KennyD to pursue this woman, but he should definitely draw the line if he ever sees her ordering an artificially sweetened soy chai latte with yeast-free Vegemite on wheat-free toast washed down with diet-sparkling water.

Thankfully, such specimens of female are strictly confined to Surry Hills.


March 19, 2009 at 12:28 pm 2 comments